So, as you all know, I'm going through some life changes in the way I handle situations on a daily basis, how I live, etc. Yesterday, I was in bible study (sidenote: you'd be surprised how many don't know what Ash Wednesday really is or why we fast) and the teacher said something that stuck out to me. He said "You must not have faith, you must live faith". What he meant by that was, there are going to be down periods in your life (hell, your day) when you feel down, defeated and just overall negative, but that's normal and try not to let the naysayers who say "well, well, just read the bible or quote you some scripture" make you feel bad cause your having a bad day.In so many words, he said tell them to "f" out, you know what to do and keep it moving. Cause in reality, you'll feel better in few (seconds, minutes, hours, whateves)
Anyhoo, though I'm going this change, I'm still smart-ass, witty Taryn. Now, when I was my most recent relationship, people were like you change. So, it's like "okay, i'm single again, I'm back", but now if I say "Oh, (old hookup) I don't want to hang with you cause you now have a girlfriend", I'm a bitch or I get the response ("oh you got morals now"(what a bitch thing to say) or if I make some crude joke, I get "oh, what happened to "holier than thou", "thought you were changing". Honestly, the change I'm going through cannot be made in 5 months. I mean it took me 20-something years to get the I am, it's going to take a lot longer to remove my destructive ways.
So, I'm not saying I'm changing to be better than anyone or what anyone does is wrong, I'm just changing for myself to have a more fulfilling life.
So, yes I may still drink a bottle of Jack (hey, I'm a real good time then) or I may make a smart-ass remark, but doesn't make the change in life less significant. I'm still the same person, just improved.
So, again to all those that have some smart sh*t to say..."LET ME BE GREAT" (damn, haters)
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